To Foster

I don't have your phone number anymore and you damn well know why, but I have something to tell you.

I hope you realized how much you ruined everything. I forgave you for raping me a long time ago, but I can't forgive you for being the reason Ashley turned on me. Who do you fucking think you are? What consequences did you face? Your best friend got you out of legal trouble and your girlfriend was willing to pounce back onto your arm. My best friend won't talk to me anymore and thinks I'm a lying whore and you're best friend, the boy I was in love with, hates me.

Thanks for proving that people really don't give a fuck about rape. I've been asked for my decibel level, but everyone's just accepted that schizophrenics have no control, but fuck you. Stay the fuck on your meds and don't do this again.

A text message I couldn't send

A year ago almost to the minute I gave you a letter detailing all of the things I wanted you to apologize to me for. I don't know who I was to demand that. I love you, even if you frustrate me. I don't know anymore, maybe I should've apologized. I've stuck to my story and I thought that was enough, but sometimes I can't help but wonder if maybe you were the one that was right. I don't know and it hurts me to know that we hate each other over something neither of us remembers. I kind of wish you were the same person you used to be, but I'm not really the same person either.